SCENE 2501
Imperial War Room for the Orion Sector. The USUAL SUSPECTS are observing their tactical holomap.
REFSITH: I've just confirmed reports that the Alkari have followed the Mrrshans into oblivion.
WIN: Excellent. Transports are already en route to the human home star; dispatch both halves of our main assault force.
WIN: The last of the rebels shall soon be mine.
SCENE 2504
Imperial Holonews Chamber. DAR REFSITH is displaying the information terminal to CAPTAIN KIRK AIRGUITAR, who is wearing energy shackles, and held by two DARLOK IMPERIAL GUARDS. The display lights up, REVEALING C3-D0 THE NEWSDROID, who reports on various Darlok economic indicators and the curious rise in school and laboratory construction, out of all proportion to the now-insignificant trickle of new retrofitable unknown technologies from the rebels' few remaining holdout worlds.
REFSITH: Well, some people watch him on a flat screen, but we prefer the holo-display.
AIRGUITAR: Oh, I see: 3-D! Oh, how cool!
REFSITH: You bet! It's amazing what they're doing with modern technology. Droids even have emotions! In fact, C3-D0 is actually married!
AIRGUITAR: What?! There are girl droids?!
REFSITH: Sure! They just use letters in place of the final numbers in their names. Take C3-D0's wife, for instance.
C3-D0: Please!
REFSITH: Thanks for that. Anyway, she's B8-FL. Their wedding was open to everyone, not just droids, and it was all catered by this one droid master-chef, B4-U8. And presiding over the ceremonies, they had a special marriage-protocol droid, U2-R1.
AIRGUITAR: All right, that's it! One more droid pun, and I'm going to...
REFSITH: B2-R8 to speak to me? Good choice. He's a great protocol droid to use when your emotions get the better of you.
AIRGUITAR: (Speechless, seething)
REFSITH: Uh, you'd better take the floor, C3-D0. He may explode if I make another, and I'm not sure I can stop myself....
AIRGUITAR: "Also in the news?!" His top story is some merchant giving you guys two trillion credits you'll never even use? When you just wiped out the entire Sakkra race in the Orion sector?!
REFSITH: Well, yeah. Wiping out rebel races has kind of become routine. Here; let me show you. Check out the way the sector has evolved in just the last six years.
AIRGUITAR: ulp.
SCENE 2505
Imperial War Room for the Orion Sector. DARK LORD DAR WIN OF THE SITH is grinning up at images of his sector's IMPERIAL STARFLEET as DAR REFSITH enters the room.
REFSITH: Whoa. Thirty-six hundred Tiffy Bombers? Isn't that kind of overkill?
WIN: What else would the Emperor have permitted us to build? And don't even get started on the Interdictors. I'm well aware their name is misspelled. I'm also well aware that's a better name for a Dissipator cruiser. They turned out to be really effective ships with their repulsors and auto-repair anyway.
REFSITH: Uh-huh. And what about those Modified Corvettes?
WIN: The Scatter VII Missile boats? They're a total waste of space. I tried them out on a whim, and promptly discarded it afterward. Now, what did you come in for?
REFSITH: Just to report that we've lost our "honored guest." He started singing, and one of his guards hit him with a full-charge blast from a fusion rifle. This is all that's left of the poor guy. (Presents a smouldering toupee.) Should we court-martial the guard, do you think?
WIN: Airguitar was singing? No. Obviously a case of justifiable homicide. Now excuse me; I'm giving the orders for our starfleet to bomb that final human world out of existence.
SCENE 2606
Interplanetary space. A SITH TRANSPORT SHIP and ESCORTS approach ORION PRIME from the NIGHT side. DARK LORD DAR WIN OF THE SITH and DAR REFSITH are VISIBLE in the transparent upper cockpit of the SITH TRANSPORT SHIP. As THE GUARDIAN moves around the world toward combat range, DARK LORD DAR WIN OF THE SITH adjusts a series of controls, and the GUARDIAN slows, turns, and joins the escort.
WIN: The last of the rebels have been wiped out! Now I, and I alone, control the Dark Side of Orion! And with its power, I soon shall rule not only the Orion Sector, but the entire galaxy ... and beyond!
REFSITH: Uh-huh. I happen to notice that we wiped out the rebels in spite of their alliance and in spite of their control over the Orion Force. What makes you think you'll fare better than they did?
WIN: Simple. The Emperor is a superstitious whack job who refuses to allow anyone to do research for fear of offending the Dark Side of the Orion Force or whatever. I however, as of now, am initiating scientific research on all the worlds in the Orion sector, using the Dark Side of Orion merely as a screen to prevent the emperor from realizing what I'm doing. No single technology, nor even a whole stream of them provided by some fantastic Orion Force, nor any amount of mystic mumbo jumbo, can stand up to objectively-reasoned hypotheses tested against verifiable fact. The Emperor, like each of the Rebels, is going down.
REFSITH: Wait a minute! Your name isn't Win! Dar isn't a title! Dar win is your real name! And with a space in a silly and unexpected place, that can only mean....
WIN: That's right! (Removes his cowl, REVEALING his black helmet, then removes that, REVEALING...) I'm a PSILON IN DISGUISE!!! Just like Zygot ! And (eyes narrowing) I have no room for Dark Lords of the Sith or any other priests of dark religions and superstitions in my cabinet!
REFSITH: Ha! I'll bet you don't! But I'm not a Dar either - in fact, everyone just assumed I should have the title because of the Sith in my name! I'm RefSith Meep Gleep, and I.... (Removes his cowl, REVEALING...) ...am a Yehat Terminator copilot!!!
DAR WIN: Dude!
REFSITH MEEP GLEEP: Dude!!!
BOTH IN UNISON: Let's rock this galaxy!!!!!
GHOSTLY FORCE-APPARITION OF KIRK AIRGUITAR: Buuuum-BUM bum-ba-ba...
EVERYONE AVAILABLE AND THEN SOME: SHUT UP ALREADY!!!
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